Who Says You Can’t Go Home?

On March 29th, my friend Kristin bravely shared her story, publicly, on Facebook detailing her and her husband Kevin’s personal and private crisis that their family had been dealing with silently for years.

Her story was about having to resort to taking their daughter Abbi, 16, to the Emergency Room in San Antonio, Texas because they were at a loss on what to do to bring her some comfort and peace while keeping her, themselves, their younger two children, Kristin’s mother and their animals safe in their home.

While at the hospital, they gained the knowledge that there are no facilities, state, private or otherwise that will accept Abbi in the entire state of Texas. The only option they were given was to surrender their parental rights and give Abbi to the foster care system of Texas. That could and would never happen. Texas ranks 50th in the United States for mental health care. 50th. Dead last. And the wait list for services for Abbi through the state was 13-15 years long. This trip ended with them being sent home, with a prescription for Ativan, and no hope for help in sight.

It became of utmost importance to get the Rose family back to Arizona where Abbi would be able to receive the help she and her whole family desperately needed. When they lived in AZ previously, Abbi was able to attend school, and receive in-home help, therapy and respite for the family. These services were vital to her health and growth, as well as for the entire family. In Arizona, Abbi was cared for and helped as was her family.

Abigail Elizabeth Rose (Abbi) is a beautiful 16 year old girl. She has severe autism. She has an incredibly rare condition called Doose Syndrome, which means that she has seizures constantly, both myoclonic and aestatic, hundreds per hour, all over her brain. She has been given the diagnosis of Epilepsy, Global Developmental Delay with Regression, Cortical Visual Impairment and Sensory Integration Disorder.

Abbi is also a funny, beautiful, lovable girl who stole my heart from the minute that I laid eyes on her. She loves to watch videos and communicate to you through them. She loves to go on rides, staring out the window at the world as it zooms by. She taught me that I wanted to someday be a mother. She gave me my first crazy, drool-y baby kisses. Hers were some of the first diapers that I ever changed in my life. She stole my heart and she still has it.

AsI sat back and watched my best friend and sister of my heart go through this from a thousand miles away I started to feel helpless and hopeless. Seeing her and her family hurting and in crisis was unbearable for me. Now take that, multiply it by about million, and that might be a fraction of what they were feeling. Something had to be done.

I called Kristin and told her one thing…

“We’re going to bring you home.”

I didn’t know for sure how I was going to do it, but I had some ideas. The first being, to make a promise to my best friend and keep it. So I promised her that we would bring them home.

On April 5th 2018, I created a GoFundMe for the family, Abbi’s Big Move, and sent it out into the world, sharing on Facebook, Twitter, and any other platform that I could think of, praying that it would help me keep my promise and help their family. Within 48 hours, over $1500 had been raised. I was blown away, sitting in my house, sobbing with gratitude.

Drew proposed the next amazing idea… a benefit show for the family. Kristin was coming to Arizona with her daughter Anna in July. We would do it then so that people could see her and hug her and she could see the amazing embrace of a community that loves them and wanted to help them, and help Abbi.

Drew and I, with the help of our amazing friends Sandra and Gil (owners of Taj Mahal Prescott and Scotsdale), began to plan the benefit. Without a seconds hesitation, every one from Drew’s band, Blaine Long & Rosas del Rey, immediately put it on their calendar and devoted their time, energy and heart into it. Kaileena Martin and Dan Seaman, as well as The Cheektones Trio immediately jumped on board. The night had an amazing lineup, one not to be missed.

Businesses and friends in the community came pouring in with contributions to the benefit to raffle off. A guitar, custom artisan jewelry, art work, gift certificates and more were collected. Taj Mahal also decided that they would donate 40% of the nights sales on food. Again, I found myself sitting in my house, sobbing at the enormity of love and compassion and community.

The benefit was an amazing success… packed all night, a constant flow of friends and community members all sharing their love, time and money to help my friends. Honestly, I found myself overwhelmed at the enormity of it all… finding quiet corners to breathe, think and cry tears of overwhelming gratitude.

At the end of the night, exhausted and overwhelmed, we totaled everything up. We had raised over $2,400 in a matter of 5 hours. Combined with what had been raised with the GoFundMe, and Kristin’s massive yard sale (“The Purge”)… it was enough.

We did it.

They were going to be able to come home.

SOON.

The following Tuesday, as we drove Kristin and Anna to the airport, we promised that it wasn’t “Goodbye”… it was “See you again soon, for forever”.

And now… two weeks after our airport “See you soon”s, I can answer the question of “Who says you can’t go home?”. The answer for the Rose family is no one.  No one told them they couldn’t go home to Arizona.

They all rallied together and said overwhelmingly…

“We are bringing you home.”

And they did. They are coming HOME. Soon. They will be here in about a week.  Prepare to see these amazing faces in your lives… they have so much love and creativity and passion and community to share with everyone who banded together to bring them home.

Words cannot express the amount of gratitude and overwhelming joy and love I have for this community and the community of friends and family online, near and far, who cared to help, to listen, to share, and to let the Rose family know that they are not alone. They are heard, they loved and they are wanted here in this community.

I will spend the rest of my life in awe and wonder at the magic that has taken place. The kindness, the heart, the compassion and the generosity is unparalleled to anything I have ever seen in my life.

Thank you all for helping me keep my promise.

They’re coming home.

You can always come home.